My Alphas' Dark Desires-Chapter 88: Internal Sinful Need

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Chapter 88

~Dristan’s POV~

I couldn’t stop thinking about that kiss.

Valerie’s lips had burned against mine days ago, and yet the sensation still lingered like it just happened.

I told myself to forget it. Over and over again. I did not need that distraction, even though I had been the one to initiate the kiss.

I didn’t deserve it or her.

I trained harder, sparred until my knuckles bled, and repeated every commandment drilled into me by my father until my ears rang with them.

Do not lose control.

Do not show weakness.

Do not forget your place.

And yet...

Every time I closed my eyes, I saw her face. Every time I tried to focus, I felt her hands in my hair, and the sound of her breath caught in her throat. The way her eyes had widened when I kissed her.

I had kissed her like I needed to. Like I was afraid I’d never get the chance again.

And she hadn’t stopped me. Valerie had kissed me back.

And then... nothing.

No answers. No words. We haven’t spoken about it till now. I could sense she was stressing about something. Deep down I hoped it was our kiss and not. Why? I couldn’t stomach hurting her.

But then I wanted and needed her. To feel Valerie’s body beneath mine while I showered her with kisses, to hear her sweet moans when my hands roamed her skin and massaged her lovely c-cup breasts and milky thighs...

I swallowed, taking in a deep breath to calm my body and my desires. Soren was surging with need inside me.

We both needed our mate, but everything was just too confusing for her, and I hated how Valerie didn’t bother to come to me for help.

All I got was just distance. It was maddening.

I decided to go to class; that way, I could distract my mind from these sinful thoughts.

Soren had been restless all morning, pacing in circles inside me like a caged beast. It was a constant hum beneath my skin, like lightning under the surface, like I was going to split open if I didn’t find her.

When I didn’t see Valerie in Psychology Class, I gave up.

No one questioned when I walked out. No one dared.

My steps were heavy as I made my way back to the shared house reserved for the Alpha heirs. I wasn’t thinking straight, not really.

All I knew or wanted then was a cold bath to calm me down and my sweet pill, Valerie. But as soon as I crossed the southern archway of campus to the dorms, Soren stilled. Alert.

Her faint scent assaulted my nostrils. Just ahead.

"What’s she doing here?" I muttered, slowing down.

I followed the trail until the house came into view, but my instincts told me not to step out in the open.

So I veered off, ducking into the row of thin trees that lined the west side of the house—barely there, but just enough for me to disappear.

That’s when I saw her.

Valerie was standing near the wall of the house; no, she was pressed against it.

And she wasn’t alone. She was with Axel.

I knew it was him even before I saw his face. His scent was always too loud, too smug, and too possessive.

I crouched, hidden, but my entire body went still the second he leaned in. The moment his lips touched hers, something inside me shattered.

Soren roared to life, snapping and growling, ready to break free and tear Axel off her, but I managed to swallow every growl and snarl.

"Let me out," he snarled.

"No," I said, barely keeping my composure. My claws were halfway out. My jaw locked.

Because she didn’t pull away, she wasn’t shoving him back like she had stopped me later when I wanted to touch her after our kiss.

She wasn’t yelling or getting angry. She wasn’t even flinching. Instead, Valerie Nightshade was kissing him back.

And not just out of instinct, but with feeling.

"She’s mine," Soren howled. "She kissed us first."

Yes, we did take it, but somehow Xade announced it and opened the door for the others to go after her.

I swallowed down the pain burning up my throat, rage twisting through my ribs like a knife.

But I didn’t move. I couldn’t because no matter how much I wanted to drag her away from him, throw Axel through the damn wall and claim her again, I knew what that would look like.

Desperate. Unstable. And worse—weak.

So I forced myself to stay crouched in the shadows like a goddamn spy, chest heaving, fangs clenched so tightly I thought they’d crack.

I hated this.

Not just because she kissed him, but because something in her had changed.

She wasn’t confused. She was choosing.

Or maybe she wasn’t choosing anyone and just letting things happen. Letting herself be pulled in all directions while the rest of us unravelled.

And yet... just as fast as it started, it stopped. Valerie pulled away. Her fingers lifted toward her temple like she was shaking something off.

I watched her stiffen at first, then her eyes flicked toward the trees—toward me.

She felt me.

I didn’t move, didn’t make a sound, but I knew. Somehow, she’d sensed me. And then she looked away.

She placed a hand on Axel’s chest when he tried to kiss her again and said something I couldn’t hear. They spoke for a few minutes before she walked away.

My entire body trembled with the effort not to follow her.

I pressed a hand to the tree trunk beside me, nails digging into the bark as wood splintered beneath my palm.

When the house was finally empty, when Axel was gone too, I let out a breath I didn’t know I was holding.

My heart felt like it had been stomped on and set on fire.

What was worse was the fact that I didn’t have the right to be angry. I had kissed her. She kissed me back.

And Valerie owed me nothing. Still, like a love fool always in control, it didn’t stop the ache nor stop Soren’s growl from echoing through my skull.

"Next time," he whispered. "We won’t let go."