ISEKAI? More like I See Crap!-Chapter 124: Eager for Noms ( )

Later that morning...

The sky was still dim, with a soft blue mist hanging over the quiet streets of Beastkin Town. The lanterns along the main road flickered softly, and only a few early risers were out—mostly merchants setting up their stalls or shopkeepers sweeping in front of their stores.

Hazuki shuffled along the cobbled path, yawning big like a tired walrus, stretching his arms over his head.

"Damn it, Ridan..." he grumbled sleepily. "Are you my alarm clock now? Why did you shout in my ear first thing in the morning?!"

Floating lazily next to him, Ridan crossed his cloudy arms with a smug look.

"You snore like a demon, you idiot. I swear, the people in the rooms next to you knocked on the walls all night."

Hazuki frowned. "Hey! It’s not my fault, okay? It’s nature! Yeah, nature, you heard me!"

"Nature your ass. I thought a bear was mating with a trumpet."

"Ugh! You’re the worst."

"You’re the worst," Ridan shot back with a grin.

Hazuki rubbed his eyes and looked around the slowly brightening town square.

"...Now where should we go?"

"I don’t know, idiot. Now that you’re awake, are you hungry?"

Hazuki scratched his stomach. "Kind of..."

He looked around at the closed shops. "Does this town even have anything open this early? It’s barely dawn, you silly spirit."

Ridan floated in a slow circle above him. "Find a bakery or something. You always sniff out melon buns like a bloodhound."

Hazuki narrowed his eyes. "...You’re not wrong."

Ridan pointed a wispy tendril down the street. "There. See that sign with the steam symbol? It might be a tea shop or a breakfast place."

"Let’s go," Hazuki yawned again. "Before my stomach eats my liver."

Hazuki flopped down into a chair outside a cozy-looking food stall that had steam rising from the back and a sleepy-eyed owner just finishing setting up the tables.

He leaned back, stretched—

Then suddenly slapped both palms on the table like an excited kid waiting for candy.

"OWNER!!" he shouted without any volume control.

From inside the stall, a slightly startled beastkin man with bear ears peeked his head out.

"Yes, Mr. Human? What do you need?"

Hazuki leaned forward with a big grin. "Breakfast! Breakfast!!"

His hands smacked the table again—not hard, but like a kid eager for festival food.

The owner blinked. "Err... it’s still early... The soup’s still boiling and not ready yet..."

"Whatever!!" Hazuki waved dramatically. "Just give me noodles! Or rice! Or... something! And a hot drink! Coffee! Yeah! Coffee!!"

The vendor stared for a moment at the excited human bouncing in his seat, then sighed with a tired chuckle.

"...One bowl of morning noodles and coffee. Coming right up."

"Yesssss!" Hazuki pumped his fist and then leaned back with a dreamy expression. "Man... early morning, hot food, quiet street... this is the good life."

Ridan floated down onto the table and gave him a look.

"You act like you’re a noble visiting a hot spring."

"I feel like one."

"You look like a broke traveler who stole a noble’s mood."

"Don’t ruin this for me, spirit balloon."

The steam rose gently as the owner placed a bowl of hot noodles in front of Hazuki.

"Here’s your hot noodle soup," he said.

Hazuki’s eyes lit up like a child on his birthday.

"Ohhhh!! This is GOOD!!" he beamed, rubbing his hands together in excitement.

He looked down at the table and saw a wooden spoon... and something else—some strange two-pronged wooden stick.

"Err... do you have chopsticks?" he asked, raising his hand.

"Choup... stek?" The owner tilted his head.

Hazuki blinked. "Ah... never mind."

Feeling resigned, he grabbed the wooden spoon and scooped up a mouthful of hot soup, slurping it happily.

"Mmm—oh yeah, that’s the stuff."

He didn’t notice Ridan floating quietly beside him, now extending part of his cloud-like body into the bowl, sipping some of the steam.

"Mmm... well. This is good," Ridan murmured, sounding satisfied.

Hazuki nearly dropped the spoon. "OI!! That’s dirty!! You’re gonna ruin my meal!"

"Huh?" Ridan blinked. "It’s not going to ruin it! I didn’t even touch the noodles! Cheapskate!"

"You’re literally made of smoke!"

"And you’re literally made of drama."

From behind the counter, the owner just stared at Hazuki, watching him shout at what seemed to be thin air while guarding his noodles like a gremlin.

The beastkin scratched his cheek and muttered under his breath,

"...This black-haired human is weird."

Slurrrppp!

Slurppppp!

"Ahhh~!" Hazuki exhaled, his eyes half-closed in bliss. "This... is heaven."

Beside him, Ridan floated in his usual lazy swirl, but with both eyes wide and glowing. He dipped a tendril of his cloudy form into the bowl again, sipping steam and flavor like he was drinking through a phantom straw.

"Ohhh!! The taste! The taste!!" Ridan cried. "Oi, Hazuki! Order more!"

Without hesitation, Hazuki slapped the table. "OWNER!! One more!!"

The bear-eared vendor poked his head out again, eyebrows raised. "...Right. Coming right up."

"And coffee!" Hazuki added, pumping his fist. "Strong one! Big glass!"

"Yes, yes..." the owner muttered, disappearing back behind the curtain.

Hazuki leaned back in his chair with a satisfied grin.

"You see, Ridan? This is what life’s about. Good food. Warm mornings. No monsters. No explosions."

Ridan floated in a slow spin next to him, eyes closed in a food-induced daze. "Mmmm... Even if you’re dumb, you sure know how to find food."

The beastkin owner peeked out again—this time holding a second tray. He eyed Hazuki curiously.

"...Is the coffee for your imaginary friend too?"

Hazuki blinked. "Huh? Nah. I’m drinking that. He’s just a moocher."

"Rude," Ridan muttered, still sipping steam beside him.

The owner sighed. "Weird human..."

Burp.

Hazuki leaned back in his chair, patting his stomach like a satisfied king. "Now I’m full..."

Beside him, Ridan floated lazily, puffing up slightly like a relaxed cloud after rain. freēwēbnovel.com

"Man... this is good," Ridan sighed happily. "I still can’t believe that even as a spirit, I can taste food. Honestly, I think we should find more food after this."

Hazuki raised an eyebrow. "Oi, I still haven’t withdrawn anything from my bank account," he grumbled, pulling out his Adventurer Card and waving it a little.

Ridan snorted. "Huh? Just sell the loot you got from that monster before—what was she again? Oh right! That creepy chick pretending to be a hurt girl on a tree stump."

"AH!!" Hazuki slapped his forehead. "Now I remember!!"

He fumbled into his bag and pulled out a small pouch he got after defeating that forest monster and looting a field of corpses.

"Oho! Jackpot!" Hazuki grinned. "Let’s sell this first!"

Ridan floated slowly around him like a smug mosquito. "And after selling, put it in your bank account. Don’t carry all your money like an idiot."

"Yeah, yeah..." Hazuki nodded, tying the pouch and hugging it briefly. "Hmm... I wonder if this is enough to buy land?"

Ridan blinked and then burst out laughing in midair. "You? LAND!? Pfft!!"

Hazuki glared. "What’s so funny!?"

"You think land’s cheap? Try three hundred gold coins for a run-down patch of dirt! Minimum!"

"Ugh... I know!" Hazuki crossed his arms, sulking. "Still... it would be nice to have my own home. Somewhere quiet. With snacks."

"...Wait a second," Hazuki narrowed his eyes. "How do you know that’s my dream anyway?"

Ridan didn’t answer. He hovered over Hazuki’s head, whistling innocently, then floated higher and started spinning dramatically, pretending to be a ceiling fan.

"Oi! Don’t dodge the question, damn spirit!!"

( End of Chapter )